probablymonsters.com website review

About 188 KiB of JavaScript is downloaded but never used on this page. Google estimates it would make the page about 1.1 s faster on a phone.

Your mobile performance score is 68 (desktop: 99). Pages that score under 90 lose visitors before the first paint.

The page goes through 1 redirect before it starts loading, costing about 757 ms. Link and advertise the final URL directly.

3 long tasks block the main thread while loading, the longest for 75 ms. During a long task the page ignores taps.

About 14 KiB of CSS is downloaded but never applied on this page.

Desktop scores 99 but mobile only 68. A gap that wide usually means heavy scripts and images that hit phones hardest.

Real Chrome users on phones do not pass Google's Core Web Vitals on this page (28-day field data from the Chrome UX Report (opens in a new tab)). Google uses this in ranking.

Your largest element takes 7.4 s to render on a phone. Google's threshold for “good” is 2.5 s.

The page becomes fully interactive after 7.4 s. Good is under 3.8 s.

Real visitors wait 2.7 s for the largest content to appear (75th percentile). Good is under 2.5 s.

Real visitors wait 1.1 s for your server to start answering (75th percentile). Good is under 800 ms.

The first text or image appears after 2.9 s on a phone. Good is under 1.8 s.

Visually, the page fills in at 4.6 s (Speed Index). Good is under 3.4 s.

7 images have no width and height attributes, so the layout jumps as each one loads.

Over the last 25 four-week periods to 2026-10-24, real Chrome visitors' tap response (inp) went from 172 ms to 178 ms at the 75th percentile (Chrome UX Report (opens in a new tab) history).

1 image is downloaded at several times the size a phone draws it, for example hordes-keyart-1080.webp at 1,920 px wide, shown at 390 px. Resized copies would save about 63 KiB.

By the Sustainable Web Design model, a visit to your homepage emits about 0.33 g of CO₂e: 39.8 kg a year at 10,000 visits a month. It scales with page weight, so every byte cut lowers it.

[role="img"] and [role="image"] elements must have alternative text: 5 elements on the page fail this check, rated serious by axe-core.

1 form field has no label, so screen readers announce an empty box and autofill guesses.

The <html> element has no lang attribute, so screen readers may read the page in the wrong voice and accent.

Your page has no <title>, so Google has to invent the blue link in search results.

No meta description, so Google writes its own snippet from whatever text it finds.

There is no <h1>, so neither visitors nor Google get a clear main headline.

No structured data (JSON-LD), so Google can't show rich results such as your logo, ratings or FAQs.

No canonical URL, so duplicate versions of the homepage (with or without www, with tracking parameters) can split ranking signals.

No Open Graph image (also missing: og:title, og:description), so links shared on LinkedIn, Slack or Facebook show no preview picture.

The homepage links to only 0 pages on your own site, so visitors and crawlers find few routes into the rest of it.

No favicon is declared in the HTML, so browser tabs and Google's mobile results may show a generic icon.

No twitter:card tag. X falls back to Open Graph, which is incomplete here.

A phone browser shows 660 words, but the HTML your server sends has only 0. GPTBot, ClaudeBot and PerplexityBot read that HTML without running JavaScript, so they see an almost empty page. Server-side rendering or pre-rendering fixes it.

There is no Organization (or LocalBusiness) JSON-LD, so search engines and AI assistants have no machine-readable facts about who runs the site: its name, logo, profiles and contact details.

There is no https://www.probablymonsters.com/llms.txt, a short Markdown guide to your key pages for AI tools (llmstxt.org). It is optional and few AI tools read it yet, so treat it as a cheap extra.

No viewport meta tag, so phones render the desktop layout zoomed out.

The page has no <!DOCTYPE html>, so browsers render it in quirks mode.

No character set is declared, so some characters can render as gibberish.

We found no call-to-action buttons or links (such as “Book a demo” or “Get a quote”) anywhere on the homepage.

No testimonials, customer logos, ratings or customer counts on the homepage: nothing tells a new visitor that others already trust you.

No analytics or tag manager detected in the HTML, so you can't measure whether any of these fixes work.

No phone number or email link on the homepage, so ready-to-buy visitors have one fewer way to reach you.

There is no form on the homepage, so every lead has to click through to another page first.

No guarantee or risk reducer (money-back, free trial, no credit card) is mentioned, which is often what tips a hesitant visitor.

The homepage carries about 660 words of visible text.

Before a visitor clicks anything, the page loads Google Ads and Google Tag Manager (measured from a US location before any click). No consent tool was detected. Visitors from the EU, UK and several US states must be asked first.

No known cookie consent tool loads with the page. Some sites build their own banner, and some only show one to visitors from the EU.

Loading the homepage contacts 2 hosts run by other companies (fonts, scripts, analytics, ads), each of which sees the visitor's IP address.